Thursday, April 16, 2009

Bleh

You with the sad eyes,
Don't be discouraged,
Though I realise,
It's hard to take courage,
In a world full of people,
You can lose sight of it all,
And the darkness there inside you makes you feel so small,

- Eva Cassidy, True Colours

*****

Today was a bleh day. It was completely just... bleh. It wasn't a bad day in and of itself. But it's one of those sorts of things where it only takes like one bad thing to make everything else seem crappy too? Yeah. Nothing overly terrible happened. But after a brief altercation with my father, everything just seemed to go downhill. Just one of those days where you lose all motivation to do anything. I spent today laying in bed re-watching Season 1 of Gilmore Girls. Haha. I really need to go out and buy Season 3. Bleh.

I remember before, days like this would seem like the end of the world. But it seems like I was such a different person back then. I used to revel in being miserable. Sure it wasn't an exactly pleasant feeling, but haven't you ever heard someone say that "it hurts so good?" I mean yeah, I just got caught up in the drama and romanticism of the whole "broken heart" bit. But truthfully that's not who I am anymore. I mean yes, today was a pretty crappy day. And I feel very very crappy at this moment. But I know that I won't be feeling this way always. I've been flipping awesome for weeks. This is just a little speed bump.

I've had "choose to be happy" told to me a lot. And yeah, I can see how it helps. I mean in most situations I can just ignore unhappy feelings and focus on being happy. And that makes me a better person as on the whole. I mean, not letting things get you down can't be a bad thing, right? There are situations however, where you're simply unable to react any other way. Such as when the other party gets SO pissed of at something so trivial, or something that you couldn't have done any differently. It sort of just gets you down and demoralizes you, if only for the day.

Really, I had a terrible day today. But that's okay I have another one tomorrow. Hopefully it'll be better. I hate this feeling but I know that it's just temporary. That being said I still feel very crappy as of right now.

I swear, if anyone tells me to be happy, I'm going to sucker punch them in the face. This is one of those times a significant other comes in handy to cheer you up and have someone to talk to. But that's neither here nor there. And the added stress just ain't worth it in the long run anyways.

Ugh.

That's it for tonight.

Jared

*****

I see your true colours shining through,
I see your true colours,
That's why I love you,
So don't be afraid,
To let them show,
Your true colours,
True colours,
Are beautiful,
Like a rainbow

- Eva Cassidy, True Colours (Chorus)

1 comment:

Liz said...

Be happy, Jared!!! wakakakkakaa

(I'm only saying this to you here after you said not to cos I know that you CAN'T sucker punch me in the face. MUAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA XD)

Take care, miss ya!